Becoming

They handed me my baby,
and said congratulations mum.
We took him home with our new titles,
not sure how to ‘become’.

I ran that word across my mind,
I weighed what it all meant.
And day by day I fumbled along,
feeling completely spent.

What did it all mean for me?
Was I cut out for this job?
It all felt quite momentous,
but my brain was in a fog.

Days rolled into weeks,
and the months were quick to follow.
Tears, laughter, joy and pain,
but who I was felt rather hollow.

My heart was full to bursting,
and my love was rock solid.
But I longed to be seen and heard,
was it just me who sometimes felt bothered,

By this gnawing feeling in my gut,
that who I was, was now gone.
That the pieces of who I was becoming,
needed some time and light shone.

I discovered that there is a word, f
or this normal transition to ‘mum’.
Matrescence is the period,
when your whole world changes and you ‘become’.