I don’t believe there’s such a thing as ‘balance’ - that social idea of being able to do just enough of everything to get it right and feel ‘whole’. I believe it’s a false aspiration intended to shame us, stress us out and leave us feeling like what we’re doing is never enough, that we should keep trying to do more.
We are already WHOLE. Perfectly imperfect and whole. Who we are is already enough.
Life is a juggle and it is normal not to have it ‘all together’ (whatever that means), or have it all figured out. We were never meant to.
We are already ENOUGH, especially for our children who see us as their world.
Instead of trying to find balance we need to throw that word out and accept the juggle. Sometimes things need to be dropped in order to elevate others. Rather than trying to do it all, what is the most important thing, now, that needs our attention? What will matter in a week, a month, a year’s time? What do we value most and how/where can we include those things we need to feel - supported, fulfilled, seen and heard.
Given the way women and mothers are socialised this isn’t often easy, straightforward or readily supported by the structures we have around us.
It takes baby steps, being kind to ourselves and looking critically at the messages we’re receiving from the world around us - who do they benefit, who loses, do they add value or create more work you don’t value but feel you ‘have to do’?
Questions to consider and share below if you like - what is something you value and how are you/can you make time for it? What is something you do because you ‘have to’ and that you might need to ‘drop’ to create space for what you value?
